Slowly Passing
by AvalonAmore
Summary: Jacob mysteriously goes missing, and the pack believes him to be dead. How will Bella react after finally realizing how much she loves Jacob?
1. Chapter 1

_Hello. I'm Avalon Amore. This is my first fanfiction I have written. I love Bella and Jacob storys and decided to write one of my own. Reviews are great and flames are alright too. I Plan on updating at least once a week, hopefully more and yes this is an extrememly short first chapter but it't ment to be so that you get a feel of where the story is going. . Enjoy and let me know what you think. Thank you. 3_

_Twilight Series and it's Characters belong to Stephanie Meyer _3

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I just couldn't understand it.

Why had I not told him yet...Told him that I chose him, that I love him.

He had been so distant, almost as if he was slowly slipping threw my fingers...hoping..praying that I would not notice...where has he gone.

Yet I did, and it killed me so, watching my best friend, my sun, and my secret love, slowly dissolve before my own eyes.

Oh Jacob, what has happened to you. I of course knew of the pack, of his fear of the Cullens returning, but I no longer helded fear in that. Let them come back, I'll show them how strong I am without them. How there very enemys fixed the holes they left inside me when they left me alone with a crazy vampire hell bent of inacting revenge on me. Ill show them, I don't need them and never will, I have my family now.

God, Why didn't I tell him? Why won't the words flow from my heart and out my mouth, telling my wolf just how much I love him, need him.

I stare out the window, watching the rain run of the glass, wondering just where he is and when he will get home.

He has been gone for _13 days, 5 hours and 27 minutes _now, while i've been worrying in complete agony.

Sam and the rest of the pack won't tell me anything, they have closed me off from there lives, only awnsering my calls to tell me he is alive and not to worry, he will be home soon..but they have not awnsered in 5 days..which was slowly putting me on edge.

Charlie had not come home tonight, Billy had called him urgently to go to La Push. Even my own father felt that is wasn't important to tell me what was going on, all I could do was wait, and wait and wait.

I layed down and closed my eyes, allowing myself to slip into comforting darkness.

I woke a few hours later to the sound of a truck pulling in the yard, it was not Charlie's Cruiser..I was sure of it. I jumped from my bed and ran to open the door, not caring about my terriable state of dress. The door was opened before I got there, as I watched Sam Uley walk in, his head bowed as he seen me, his face slightly tear stained..and then I knew...something terriable had happened.

I just stared, it was all I could do, waiting for him to talk, my heart thumping aganist my chest threating to jump out if I did not get my awnsers soon.

"Bella..theres something I need to tell you", Sam looked up at me as he spoke, his eyes were sunk in, looking as awful and terriable as I felt.

The next words he said went through my mind so fast I had no time to process them. I closed my eyes fighting back the tears, watching as all my hopes and dreams flashed with light then disapeard before my eyes. My happy life with him....getting married...children...growing old..never being without him..it was all gone...

I felt as my body grew heavy...collapsing to the ground..nothing mattered anymore...Jacob....my sun....

why.....this was goodbye...I could never come back from this....no more sun....smiles....warmth....strong arms to hold me when I needed them..in a moment just like this.

Why did things have to be like this! Could I not ever have my happy ending.......I felt as my consincesness slipped from my grasp and I felt my body fade away....

I hope I never wake up...


	2. Chapter 2

Hello again. I thought you might enjoy a sooner then planned update.

The Twilight Series Belongs to Stephanie Meyer.

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21 days...2 hours and 28 minutes...

It's been that long since i have last seen him....

It hurt so badly thinking back to a few days ago when Sam told me they had lost contact with him all together. It could only mean one thing, he was in human form and could not change, or..I..a lump started to formed in the back of my throat at the though of it, cutting of my train of thought, a terriable, horriable thought..I did not want to go there.

He had informed me the only evidence that they found was his phone and a piece of his shirt a few miles back in the woods..he had been near. Could he have been on his way back? If he had been where was he now and why did he not try to call anyone?

Sam let me have his phone, unfortunally any clues that could be on it, we could not get, he had his cell charger with him. I'm almost to the point now where I might go out and get one for it, but another part of me didn't want to know, for I was scared for the worse. He had not even called, texted or contacted anyone, so why would you have your phone and not use it. This was just getting weirder and weirder, and my life was already weird enough.

They told me they had not caught the sickly sweet scent of any vampires near, it was only that I took comfort in.

Over the last few days, I spend most my time in La Push with the rest of the pack, we spend the time looking through the woods for any forms of clues, not that I, being human, was much help, to try and figure out how Jacob vanished. The only other thing we found was a bare footprint, but the foot was to small to be Jacob's, it looked female. That did not give me a warm fuzzy feeling.

Tommorow Sam wanted to go check out the Cullen's property, just incase. I however would no be going, to many uncomfortable memories surrounded that place, and I wanted no part in it.

The other days, while Charlie was at work, I spent with Billy, He was in the same state as me, and would only eat when I cooked and forced him too, but even then it wasn't easy, he was just as stubborn as his son. At least now I know where Jacob gets it.

I sighed slowing getting up after looking at the clock, Charlie would be home soon, and I better get normal soon so he doesn't threaten to send me to mom's again. Speaking of my mom, she has been acting very weird the last few times i've talked to her, well i mean weirder then normal, which is not saying to much. She ever talked about comming for a visit..my mom hates Forks...more then I ever have.

Brushing all that information off, I walked down to the kitchen, refusing to look in the mirror as I passed it, not wanting to see how sweaty my hair was or how skinny I have gotten from the lack of poor self modivation have been experiencing, and more and more of it was waning every second time passed.

I almost had supper finished, potatos, steak and corn, all Charlie's favorites, when I heard the sounds of my fathers tires crunching on the gravel in the drive way.

I set the plates of food on the table, mine having significently less, as i watched Charlie walk in with a smile on his face.

"Hi Dad, how was work today? You look happy", I went to the fridge to get drinks, not wanting to see someone so happy when i felt like my heart was missing.

"Bells, I got something for you, to try and help cheer you up, can you come out side to see it?"

I watched as Charlie looked at me, with a slight gleam of hope in his eyes. I would amuse him, but I hightly doubt anything would cheer me up.

I walked out side with him, but as soon as I took one look at what was waiting for me on the front porch, so many painful thoughts flooded into my head, it reminded me of to much..and I once again felt myself slip away.


	3. Chapter 3

_Sorry about the long wait. I had planned on updating yesterday, but unfortunally there was a forest fire so close to my house that I could see the flames from my yard and I had to be evacuated. I know it's short but I will update early this week. Hopefully on Tuesday! Please review. _

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I woke up the next morning with a pounding head ache. I rubbed the fuzzyness from my eyes, and then I remembered. I had fainted. Why had I fainted?

I jumped up when I felt something moving at the end of my bed. Pulling the blanket up, I seen the source of my fainting. A little chocolate brown puppy was staring back up at me, his tail wagging in excitment.

Oh dad, if you could only know what you have just done to my poor broken heart. I knew he was only trying to help, but this, this was probley the worse thing he could have done. This little puppy reminded me of Jacob. I know that may sound weird, since Jacob was a rust like colour when he was phased, but still, my heart ached.

During my thought process I felt as the puppy jumped in to my lap and licked at my hand. Sighing I picked up the puppy and walked downstairs. I was greeted by the kitchen table being completly covered with everything you would need for a dog, a leach, food, water bowl, toys.

Wow Charlie really went all out for this.

I noticed the clock, It was 12pm. I really over slept...also noticing that it was now 22 days, 10 hours and 24 minutes.

I took the next 2 hours to get ready to go, eating breakfast, showering, and trying to entertain a puppy that was way to hyper for it's own good. Now I know why Charlie did this, I was so busy taking care of the puppy, I didn't even have time to think about anything else, so in a way I could see how it was helpful.

I drove down to La push to meet Sam and the rest of the pack, letting the puppy sitting on the seat next to me. He was barking at every single car that drove past, I couldn't help but laugh.

After meeting up with the pack we headed out to the Cullen house. Why we are going here I have no idea, I don't see how it is going to help find Jake, but at this point I was willing to try and do anything.

On the long walk over, they were nice enough to stay in human form so I would not be left behind, I noticed that my new puppy had taken quite a liking to the members of the pack.

45 minutes later we arrived at the Cullen house. It was a sight that turned my stomach into a thousand knots.

The windows were all smashed in, there was blood trailing down some of the sides, and there were 3 rotting bodies. One was hanging out a window..his head was on the ground below it. Another at the base of a tree, his arms only hanging on by the muscles..and the last...well it was everywhere, it looked as thought it had gone threw a lawn mower.

Embry was the first to speak, " What the hell has happened here, looks like someone had a battle."

I noticed that Sam eyes were dark, and he was slightly shaking. He knew something, I could tell he did. Not even a minute later he bolted for the house and disapeard inside of the broken house. I couldn't decided if I wanted to go after him or no, to scared of what I might learn, so I just stared

at the house I once called home. Holding on to my puppy, not willing to let him go. He was wiggling something terriable trying to go exploring, when I realized that I still had not named him yet.

I did not have time to linger on that thought when the back of the house exploded, going up in flames.

_~~3 weeks earlier~~_

" I know your here! Show your face and stop running from me you coward!" Jacob was running after someone. He had to get to them, to stop them. He had been running in circles for days, and this had to come to an end. He turned around just as he heard the person he had been looking for jump down from a tree...

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_ I would like a fan of this story to be able to name Bella's new puppy. Please send suggestions in reviews. Also for sneak previews or more notice on when I will be updating, please follow me on twitter. /AvalonAmore_


	4. Chapter 4

_Heres another update! I'm slowly trying to make them longer, This is my first time writing fanfiction so please bear with me. Please review!_

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~Day 4~

I could feel the air being pushed out of my lungs, the incresing weight becoming to much to handle. It had happened so fast. They came up slowly from behind, I only caught a glimpse of their hair when I was slammed threw the window, flying into the house and through the hardwood flooring, landing in the second floor of the 3 story house.

Damn vampires. I was getting sick of this. They had me running in circles for days now. Not even burning down the house they were staying in stopped them,though I should have known they would have fled. I at least hoped that I would kill at least one of them, but no they were completly unharmed apart from the fact they were wearing burnt clothes. That ment they came directly after me. I got their attention. I had them where I wanted them. Or at least I thought I did.

I threw the wooden support beam that had fallen on me when I went through the floor, deeply breathing in the air that I had been deprived from just minutes before. I leaned over placing my hands on my thighs, it was then I felt the sharp pains of the broken glass cutting in to the tender skin on my back. I ripped my shirt off, hoping it would take most of the glass shards with it, luckly I was right, my bloody shirt and pieces of glass falling to the ground. A few pieces remained, but I did not have time to deal with them. They were comming, HE was comming, and I had to find a way to stop them. I wouldn't let them win, not this time.

I looked out the window, they were all there walking, waiting, hoping they had killed me.

Sorry bloodsuckers, it takes more then a window to kill Jacob Black. I knew I was out numberd, I should have brought the rest of the pack, but they would have tryed to stop me. Talk me out of this and call me crazy for thinking that things would come to this. But they would have been wrong, things have been resorted to this. Theses vampires are not our allies, nor did they care at all about humans, maybe they had once, but from there red eyes I knew that life was long gone.

I ran down the staires to the main level of the house. I needed to find something, anything that could help me with what I needed to do. I had to kill them, to keep her safe. My Bella. I knew she might not love me in return, at least not the way I love her, but I needed to do this for her, to keep her safe. I knew she was probley worried, wondering where I had gone to, hopefully one day I could tell her.

I didn't get the chance to think long when I felt them start to move in closer, I no longer had time to look for a weapon. I jumped through the living room window and phased. Staring at them I crouched low to the ground, and with thoughts of protecting the love of my life I bolted for him, ready to tear him to shreads.

~22 days~

I stared at the house in shock. The house was slowly being engulfed in flames. I had to watch as a places I once called home was being distroyed before my very eyes. The glass in the windows that were not already broken, blew out showering use with small hot pieces of glass. They body hanging out the window began to melt and fall with the heat, it was not a pleasent site to wittness. Panicing I ran in the direction of the house, but Embry held me back.

" Bella, don't. If you go in there your going to be killed."

I looked up at him when he spoke, slowly feeling the the tears gather and fall down my face. I hugged him, something you could tell shocked him from the way he stiffened at first but after a minute he hugged me back, something I needed. The hug only lasted a minute when I heard a small bark and realized that I was squishing my puppy between us. I steped back.

There was nothing we could do. We had no source of water to try and put the fire out and I had offered to call 911, but it was quickly pointed out that it would be really dangerous, and we could end up in jail. So we walked a distance from the house, sat down in the grass and waited.

It felt like hours had passed by the time the fire had gone out, it had started to rain, this was the one time I was thankful for rainy Forks. The house was gone, all that was in its wake was ashes and rubble.

I stared in awe. Does this mean that Sam didn't make it? Had anyone else been inside the house. I started to cry again. Burying my face into my little puppy's fur.

Minutes later I heard the boys start to cheer. I looked up to see Sam walking in our direction. His skin was slightly burnt but being a wolf it was already healing. He walked up to me, and looked down at me, sadness lacing his eyes. I looked down, there in his left hand was a shirt, a bloody, torn shirt with bits of what looked like glass sticking out of it. Then I realized, that was not just any shirt, the shirt I had bought Jacob, the day before he vanished.

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_Dog names anyone? :)_


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi guys, I know that I have not updated in a while, i've been super busy. Im gonna try to update more frequently. Thank you for your patience with me. Sorry it's short, the reason they are short is because they are usually just covering one day, i'm slowly going to start adding more detail to each day.**

**Also I would like to give a shout out to SocialWorker84, for comming up with the most perfect name for Bella's new puppy :). Enjoy.**

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Slowly the days seemed to be running more and more slowly. It had only been 2 days since I watched the Cullen house go up in flames. The same fire that had taking all evidence of what could have happened there with it. Everything except for a bloody, torn shirt, that had once belonged to the man that I so desperately loved and needed to find.

Trying to think on a lighter note, I finally had found the perfect name for my new companion. While visiting with Emily, I had seen a Quileute defination book on her beautiful book shelf. Lately books were the only thing that could keep my mind off of panicing and worrying, and seeing rows and rows of old antique looking books made my mind start to race. While flipping through the old musky pages of the old text book, Emily was in the kitchen at the time cooking supper for the pack, I came across the one word that would make the prefect name for my puppy. Qahla would be the prefect name, the meaning being sun. That one word held so much meaning for me and Jacob. He was my personal sun, lighting and warming the world around me. My would was so dark now, hopefully having this as a reminder of us would light up my surrounding even just a little.

I was pulled from my thoughts when Qahla jumped up on my lap and started sniffing and licking my cheek. I smiled at him, he always knew when I need him around to cheer me up. I could hear Emily and Sam talking in the kitchen. Charlie had to go to Port Angeles for a few days to deal with police business, so Emily and Sam asked me to stay with them, figuring I wouldn't be able to handle staying home alone.

Emily them came in to the room with a plate of food. Piled on the plate was peas, rice and steak, it smelled delicious, and since I had not been able to eat a lot resently, I started shoving food in my mouth quickly.

"Woah Bella, slow down there, we don't need you choking."

I looked up to see Sam chuckling at me. I felt the corners of my mouth slowly lift to form a smile, it felt very weird since I rarely ever smile now. I probley looked pretty funny, after not eating much for days and here I was shoving my face, and having bits of rice lining my lap.

" Well now you know how I feel when I have to see you guys eat, but at least I don't stalk and attack it first, like its gonna run away."

Sam and Emily both bursted out laughing. I sat still looking at them confused. What did I do?

"Bella, it's so nice to see you smile, and look now your back to making fun of the boys and there, slighty distuging ways of eating everything in sight." Emily was still laughing at me as she spoke.

A few hours later, I was walking down the beach, my sandles in my hand, the sun slowly setting across the water, making shapes and sparkles on the crystal like water. The feeling of the sand between my feet was a great comfort. I could see Qahla running ahead in the distance, jumping and racing with the waves as they crashed to the shore.

I was nice to be alone for once, not having to be surrounded by people who constantly reminded me of Jacob. Getting time to think and deal with my emotions that I had been hiding and bury down with in me for days. Right now I just needed to feel them and allow my mind and heart to deal with them, no matter how painful they were. Regret, Worry, Love, Fear, and Sorrow were just a few to name. Mostly I just felt numb, trying to block out all the pain for fear of self destructing. I felt tears pooling in my eyes, and I reached up to brush them off. I need to head back before dark so Sam doesn't worry and come looking for me.

I looked across the shore line when I no longer heard little barks and yips comming from Qahla. He was running in my direction with something sticking out of his mouth. Bending down, I pulled it out of his mouth to see that it was a folded piece of paper. Petting him of the head I started to unfold the paper, getting past the drool that was sticking it together, I realized that it was a note. A note written in red...dripping red liquid that I soon realized was blood.

I felt my self start to hypervenelate as I read the note. Folding it up I put it in my pocket, put Qahla on his leach and started running to Sam and Emily's house.

I just couldn't believe what I just realized.


	6. Note

Hello Everyone,

Sorry that this is not a new chapter, but I felt that I needed to let you all know what has been going on in regards to my fanfics.

It has been a year since I updated, but what a very busy year it has been, I went to culinary school for a year to become a pastry chef and it consumed all of the time that I had. I also had to deal with a computer crash that fried my harddrive, literally, so what I did have done for my stories got deleted. Also I have lost most of my interest for Twilight in recent days, but because I started these stories and I still have some of you emailing me asking for updates, I do intent to finish them. I will hopefully have an update for you in a few weeks. I am also planning on completing the Harry Potter fanfiction that I started, but unfortuanly had to take down, incase that interest you.

If you wish to contact me, see when I am working on updates or to know when I plan on updating, or even to see what I have been up to this past year that has kept me from you, any of the links on my profile will be able to help you get in contact with me. Thank you very much.


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